Kristi Pennington

It’s late September.  We have returned to one of our favorite spots in the world: A beautiful quaint cabin at the foothills of Pikes Peak, near Divide, CO. We were first introduced to this magnificent place 7 years ago when we attended the retreat, Soul Care Experience, hosted by Steve and Gwen Smith who founded the ministry Potter’s Inn.

Our lives have not been the same since. God definitely met with me and my husband in deep personal ways during those five days of retreat.

This is our third time here. God specifically revealed to me exactly what I needed to hear the previous two times – they were both pivotal pieces in my story. We planned this pilgrimage back to these mountains over ten months ago.

As so often is the case, we had no idea what would take place between then and now. But, God knew. He is meeting me here once again, graciously communicating to me, in love, exactly what my soul needs to hear and experience.

The last months have left us with deep heartache and sorrow that came through the death of someone whom I deeply loved. This death left me with much I don’t understand.

It’s such a gift from God that He brought my husband and me back to this place at a time where much needs yet to be healed, prayed through with God, restored, and re-storied. God’s gift to bring us here again allows us to continue leaning into the joy and abundance that He still desires us to have. God will continue desiring this for us until we take our last breath. Of this I am sure.

At this place there is a prayer trail which meanders around these beautiful 35 acres with twelve places to stop and sit on prayer benches. At each “milestone” you find a signpost to ponder and reflect on.

On our second day, I took extended time at the bench named: Perspective.

Myriad thoughts and even questions for God, flooded my mind. However, the one word that was like a neon light for me was GOODNESS.

It’s hard to admit, but once again, I was asking myself the question,
“Kristi, do you still believe God is good?”

I’d asked it before during the past 13 years. I remember asking this question to my sister in the months before she died with breast cancer. Do you still believe God is good?

“Oh yes, I still believe God is good!” I was relieved because if she could say it, I knew I could still say it. Sometimes we can borrow faith from someone else in our weak doubt-filled moments.

Here I am again able to stand firm upon the belief that God is good even when the emotional pain is excruciating. I continue to discover these truths that when:

• I am honest with God about how I feel. He can handle my tears, my raw emotions filled with hurt, woundedness, and disappointment.
• I write prayers of lament, pray my prayers of lament, and have experienced the gracious love and compassion from my Abba Father. When I lament, He meets me there, and He restores my soul.
• I spend time in with God in nature and listening to music that speaks healing words to my soul. When I worship, He is there.
• I sit with my Father who loves me in stillness and silence – He holds me in His arms as His dearly loved daughter.

One of the greatest gifts my Abba Father has given me in my journey is the gift of a community of godly women who are full of grace and love. They are holy listeners.

They listen without judgment. They love without judgment. They know how to pray for me because they know me well, and they know God in a deep and personal way. This gives them wisdom and discernment – knowing exactly how to pray for me as I continue walking my faith journey. I am shown God’s goodness through their lives.

13 I would have lost heart, unless I had believed  That I would see the goodness of the Lord In the land of the living. 
Psalm 27:13-14 NKJV

Where are you seeing God’s goodness today?

Where are you looking to see His goodness?

How are you being changed because of His extravagant goodness?

Is this a goodness that can be carried on through eternity with him and other beloveds? “For where your heart is, there is your treasure.” (Matthew 6:21)